The Turducken Of Cookies

I’d been obsessed with one idea for the entirety of last week – turducken cookies.  Well, not cookies made out of a chicken inside of a duck inside of a turkey, but the turducken of cookies.  You don’t even know.  OBSESSED.  I threw about a thousand different combinations around in my head, I began to go a little nuts.  I wanted, somehow, to combine every single dessert flavour profile (thanks Top Chef!) into one cookie.  Obviously, one GIGANTIC cookie, but all my cookies are always gigantic, so I could do this.

What I decided on was this (sit down if you’re not) – an Oreo, topped with Reese’s peanut butter filling, inside a chocolate chip cookie.  BOOM.

That thing you’re feeling right now is your mind being blown.

These were ridiculous and unbelievable (family members – you have to say unbelievable like my dad) and there is no reason for these to exist, BUT THEY DO AND YOUR LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN.  Ok, so they’re just cookies and that was a complete exaggeration, but they’re good.  Crazy good.

You want some.  Here.  Have some.

Turducken Cookies

And Oreo, topped with peanut butter, inside a chocolate chip cookie.  Like I said.

You’re going to want to make these right quick, so here’s what you need:

All-purpose flour, white sugar, brown sugar, confectioner’s sugar, salt, baking soda, unsalted butter, eggs, chocolate chips, peanut butter, Oreo (or Oreo-ish) cookies.  Also, not shown is vanilla and peanut butter chips.  I forgot the vanilla until after I took the shot and the peanut butter chips was a last-minute addition made from pure brilliance.

Peanut butter filling

1/4 C creamy peanut butter

1/4 C confections sugar

1/8 C packed brown sugar

1/2 T butter, softened

Before.

In a small bowl, combine everything; cover and set aside.

After.

Easy so far, right?  Well, it doesn’t get any harder.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

2 C all-purpose flour

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

3/4 C unsalted butter, melted

1 C packed brown sugar

1/2 C white sugar

1 T vanilla extract

1 egg

1 egg yolk

1 C milk chocolate chips

1/2 C peanut butter chips

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Grease or line cookie sheets.

Sift together flour, baking soda and salt; set aside.

In a medium bowl, cream together melted butter, brown sugar, white sugar until well blended.  Beat in vanilla, egg, and egg yolk until light and creamy.  Mix in the sifted ingredients until just blended.

Wet meets dry.  Then, SPOILER ALERT, they fall in love, get married, and make cookie babies.

Stir in chocolate and peanut butter chips by hand.

I poured the chocolate chips in and thought “you know what this bowl needs?  Peanut butter chips.” and so it was done.

Ok, now you have your peanut butter filling and your cookie dough.  NEXT STEP.

Take the peanut butter filling and ice one side of the Oreos (or Oreo-esque cookies, as I’ve used).

You could stop right here and still be ahead in the game of life.  Peanut butter covered Oreos, YOU WIN.

Here’s the trickiest part of all.  Take a ball of cookie dough, smoosh it out to put the Oreo inside, and then mush the dough around the Oreo so it’s completely covered.  You should get 12-14 cookies out of the deal.

My, what thick, meaty, veiny hands you have, grandma.  All the better to assemble turducken cookies, my dear.

Bake for 15 to 17 minutes, or until the edges start to look toasty.  When finished, cool on baking sheets for a few minutes before cooling completely on a wire rack.

That’s not a cookie.  THIS is a cookie.  Or an entire meal.  Either one.

I suggest not even thinking about it before you eat one because these are not, I REPEAT WITH MUCH EMPHASIS, NOT diet cookies.  Don’t bother trying to substitute with applesauce or honey or whatever.  These are garbage for you because they taste so good.  That’s how you can tell.  The deliciousness and the ten pounds of sugar and butter you just used.  Don’t think about it.  Just do it.

The turducken of cookies.  I love you so much.

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5 thoughts on “The Turducken Of Cookies

  1. Very well documented! They look so good…and I mean that in 2 ways. Obviously, good to eat but they look like a normal baked cookie some professional would have made as opposed to when I bake from a recipe and the finished product doesn’t even look remotely close to the picture with the recipe! And when I say “normal” I mean that is a good way because mine never even look “normal.” They end up looking like an amateur mess! Usually taste good but the presentation just isn’t there. Yesterday I made a flourless oatmeal cookie and they looked like science experiment gone bad.
    Sorry for my long-winded reply! To sum it up, they look amazing!

  2. OHMMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYFINNNNNNGGGGGYUMMMMMMMMMMM!
    I’m making these. Better yet, you make more of these and ship them to me. Oh and I will be pinning this on Pinterest as my favorite idea ever so prepare for your world to explode. Not that anyone cares what I like on Pinterest but these are golden genius!

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